Loving and Letting Go

The sunset, the cold breeze, the scenic view, and with you by my side, it was amazingly beautiful. We were talking about something important but I don’t just understand it well so I turn my attention to the scenery and feel the moment spent with you. It’s the best feeling I could ever have in my entire life.

“I love you.”

I get back to my senses and turned right to you with a smile on my face. Those three words could make me feel I was the luckiest girl on Earth to have an angel sent from above. I really wished I could stop the time from ticking so that I could enjoy this moment longer. Having you is the best part in my entire life. I could not ask for more because to me, you are everything that I need.

“I am happy with you.”

The feeling I felt when you say those words just make me want to leap into happiness and shout to the whole world that I love you and that I was happiest woman alive to have you.  This is the sweetest and the best moment I could ever have in my whole life. Only you could give me this feeling I thought I could never have. You brought happiness in my dimmed life. Life without you is like living without a soul.

“But I need someone else.”

Shocked. Stunned. Surprised. Astonished. Startled. Speechless. Minutes later since I get back to reality, tears started falling down on my cheeks without me realizing it. I just can’t find the right words to say in such situation where the one you loved the most would tell you that he don’t need you anymore and needed someone else that could play the role better than you. It was the most unwanted, painful words I had ever heard in my seventeen years of existence.

He was my first love. He was the first to have my trust that I never give to anyone else. He means the world to me. He means everything to me. I did all the things just to make him happy, but I guess it’s not just enough to make a man satisfied with what he already had. He gave me the feeling I never felt before. I learn to trust, care and love because of him. He was the first man to give importance to me. He was the first man that makes out the real me and the best out of me.

And he was the first man who broke my heart and now, it’s falling into pieces like no one could ever fix it. I thought he was the right one for me but, I guess, I deserve someone better.

I don’t regret the choice I had made when I gave him my ‘yes’.

He was the man I chose to love and the man I chose to let go.