Hideous

It’s never been a piece of cake looking for someone who could accept you – how you look and how you act. Someone who could still say you’re the most beautiful girl he’d ever seen even though you look exactly like the zombies on The Walking Dead in every season. Someone who could look you directly in the eyes and tell you he couldn’t ask for more even though you’re the ugliest person he’d ever seen in his whole life. Someone who would love you as days gone by setting aside how worst your looks right now.

I want that ‘someone’ to be the guy I’m falling for as of the moment.

No matter how many times he’d tell me he doesn’t freaking care how I look, I could still tell he wasn’t satisfied. He wanted me to look just perfect for him. He wanted to make me look like a goddess. And you know what’s more funny? I’m trying my freaking best to make myself look good for him. Every time we exchanged self photos, all I heard from him is critiques about how bad I look. About how my dark circles are getting to its darkest phase. About how many pimples I have on my face. About how wasted I look. About how I should always tie my hair.

Before I met him, I already acknowledged the fact that I’m not good looking, not like how my photos shows it. I’m exactly opposite. I’m just the way I am. I’m just made by God, JUST. LIKE.THIS.

And now I’m hurting like freaking thousand hurt because he’d always put on view how bad I could look and no matter how hard I try to be better for him, I just can’t. I just can’t be perfect for him.

The problem of having a good looking guy is that you have to be good looking too, so that you’d perfectly be fit together. That’s just what good-looking guys’ want- to be with someone of their equals.

Unfortunately, I’m not the gorgeous-almost-perfect type of girl. The type of girl he wants. And I’m sorry to break it for all of you, but photos could be deceiving.