Missing Piece of the Puzzle

I have lived my 18 years of existence strange to say in the absence of you. Who you are is yet enigmatical in my part. You’re of a piece of the puzzle in my vital spark that is yet to be found. And I candidly yearn for it. Sundry of queries I have in my mind through all ages that I wanted to put in the ground to shed light on the thoughts of you relentlessly scampering in my mind. 

What grounds above mediocrity do you have to come up into the conclusion of leaving us in the lurch? How can it be possible for you to beat a hasty retreat without a hitch and put us down to experience by a long chalk? How can you fall foul of your vows and abandon the ship to live with someone else and put up a further family whereas you have put us behind you from tip to toe? How can you put your back on her and play against all the angst and agony on her tod? How can you be so vicious?

If truth be told, I can’t bear you yet conversely I pine for you. I crave for the tenderness and warmth from you by far. Irrespective of how I seriously desire for you to be at this juncture, you can’t and you wouldn’t, I suppose. You were in a different place far afield from us in the course of jiffies noteworthy in my being that elapsed in a breeze without you in it. In the face of my heart bellowing your moniker frenziedly, regardless how I awfully wished upon a star for you to be in our side, you have previously made up your mind, explicitly choosing them over us which are your above-board family. 

Albeit you had forsaken us, we’re raised without a glitch even so. Hence, we’re living to tell the tale devoid of a man take as read to beaver away solely to make a profit for a family to subsist. Even supposing we don’t have you by our side, yet we have a woman who could do no matter which to bequeath us superlative existence in this globe we’re in. 

In spite of everything, yet I hanker after the day whereas I could embrace you and put across how much I have longed for you so as to feel the love and care you haul off from us from the time you had leave us behind. 

A man who could keep an eye on me and save me from any harm I may come upon, who will prop me up to things I want and to things I have a thing about, who will guide me which road to take and who will haul over the coals when I did something off the beam and eventually would embrace me, letting me off. Moreover, a man who will love me and care for me more than ever and will do whatever thing so as to make me draw a smile on my face, he is lock, stock and barrel that I craved for. 

A father.